The Power of Self-Validation
If you’ve spent any time around therapy, you’ve probably heard the word validation tossed around.
But what does it actually mean in real life? And how do I do it? Simply put, validation is that feeling of someone r acknowledging your inner experience– your thoughts, emotions, reactions - as real and understandable. It’s the subtle relief of realizing that you’re not only seen, but you’re not “too much” or “overreacting” or “crazy.” And while it’s such a gift to have people who can do that for us, the reality is they’re not always available, which is why self-validation is so important.
Similarly, self-validation is the practice of offering yourself that same understanding and acceptance. To do the same thing you would for someone else, to acknowledge your thoughts, emotions, and reactions as real and understandable.
What happens when you practice self-validation:
You interrupt the spiral of self-criticism: Responding to your feelings with compassion instead of criticism helps loosen the hold of shame and quiet that harsh inner voice.
You feel more grounded in the present moment: Putting words to what you’re feeling helps anchor you in the present instead of you getting pulled into the anxiety of the past or the future.
Your nervous system has a chance to settle: Feeling acknowledged (even if it’s by yourself) can signal safety to your nervous system and allow your body to ease.
You show up more authentically with the people you love: When you’re not pushing against what you’re feeling, it becomes easier to speak honestly and respond in a way that feels more congruent to you.
What it can sound like
Self-validation is often simple, quiet, and honest:
“Of course I’m overwhelmed, this is a lot.”
“It makes sense this brought something up for me.”
“I don’t have to rush to fix this feeling.”
“Anyone in my position might feel this way.”
Self-validation doesn’t make feelings disappear, but it often softens their intensity. By acknowledging your experience rather than resisting or dismissing it, you create space for more peace, steadiness, and self-compassion.
Here at Atlanta Wellness collective, we want to help. For support contact us or schedule an appointment online
This blog post was written by Mary London Goshert.
This blog is not intended to substitute professional therapeutic advice. Talk with your healthcare provider about your health concerns and before starting or stopping therapies. No content on this site, regardless of date, should ever be used as a substitute for direct professional advice from your doctor or other qualified clinician.
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